Remember that there are and will always continue to be some cultural differences among your Indian parents and you, which are irreversible. Depending upon how you acquaint yourself with the changing times, you will find there is a difference in thought process. You should try to learn to live with them rather than change them. Learning more about their upbringing may help you see why they expect you to appreciate what you are given.
Cope with the pressure to do well at school. Like any parent, Indian parents expect you to do well at school. Extra curricular activities are not very high with them. High grades, a medal, a certificate etc garner their kudos, especially among relatives and family gatherings. Striving for the highest grades you can achieve is not a bad thing and remember Indians in America often get the highest paying jobs.
Be active at home, with books and homework. Apart from the expectation of maintaining high academic grades, your parents will probably expect you to do homework, or "studies" at home. Recite a poem or an essay and practice before family. They will be blown away if your poem or essay is in their native language or their regional language like Marathi, Gujarati, Malayalam, Bengali etc. Try to help your parents around the house whenever you walk past them or when you have free time.
Don't get too close to the opposite sex. Your parents may not approve of you dating. In order to fit in with your peers, you can talk to girls or guys (depending on your gender) at school, but avoid activities like bringing your friend of the opposite sex home alone or often as your parents will certainly not see it in the way you might see it. Do not get into any arguments over this matter with them, especially if your parents are very orthodox and strict. You will have to deal with a lot more trouble, mentally and in some cases even physically. Try to stay low in the dating world as a teen and deal with your relationship issues as you get older with your parents. One thing to remember though is that this can be a big matter of disagreement between you and your parents, remember that the average Indian will never divorce, and most Indian marriages last for a long time. You don't want to be tied down to a marriage that you don't want to be in. Not all parents are strict. Some do encourage making friends, calling friends over regardless of gender, country etc. Appreciate if your parents are friendly and open with you. Don't break their trust by assuring them you are not dating while you are seeing someone. Be honest or wait until you are old enough. Talk it out with your parents to be sure of their expectations.
Be well behaved at school. Parents take pride in seeing their children not bullying, not fighting, and not spending time outside school after school hours. Maintain timeliness. Ask them when you'd like to stay out for longer. State why and with whom you will be and when you'll be back. Call them if you have a phone to make them know that you are fine. Try to avoid getting into too much trouble at school as your parents will dish out more severe punishments than your school district ever could. However, always remember that if you are involved in a justified fight, your parents will support you all the way, encourage your actions, and even conduct an Indian version of Face time with that horrible child.
See if your parents always go for the cheapest, the most expensive or that which comes with an offer. Most Indian parents tend to be spendthrifts. They will buy you some George jeans from Walmart even though you might have your eye on some of those swaggy jeans at West 49. They will, in time, start buying you better clothes or other products when you prove yourself to them with good grades and behavior. They also go with everyone who uses certain brands, especially if one of them is a fellow Indian.
If your parents never let you go to the mall on your own or with friends, go with them and distract them with a discount at a nice store. There is an 80% guarantee that they will be so occupied with those 'good value for money ' clothes or furniture that you can ask them for permission to browse another store and they will just say yes without thinking.
Know what you want. If your parents yell at you, never argue with them. Just keep calm. When angry, try nodding and apologizing and they will eventually cool down. Decide your college, subjects, and sports or art preference beforehand. Because parents and siblings try to make decisions for kids. Explain it to them in the form of a future plan. Have some idea or a clear future plan. Remember, at the end of the day, you are who you are and you must live your own life. Be true to yourself. If you feel opposed to something that your parents say or do (or make you do), fight for what you think is right. Set that line between your home life and your social life and enforce it.
Be responsible in front of relatives. If they have relatives or guests over, try being polite and answering their questions and ask about their family. After a reasonable time you can always use school work to excused. Behave well; other adults will notice your behaviour and report back to your parents. If the report is good, they will congratulate your parents and you will be congratulated in time, by your parents.
Try to keep your image and reputation in school good. You don't have to be a hardcore "swag" god but do not be the nerd. Hangout with everyone. Be popular. If your classmates make some Indian jokes laugh along. However, if they are making hardcore insults about India or your culture, show them the classic Indian talent of a good beating. Do not be worried about getting in trouble at home as your parents will strongly condone your actions given the circumstances.
Save up for your own things. If you are 16 and you want a car, get one when you get your own job because there is a small chance they will see eye to eye with you on that. Remember, back in the 1970s and '80s in India, cars, TVs, phones, microwaves, washing machines, and even western style sitting toilets were only for the extremely wealthy. If you fight for what you think is right, there is a chance that they will end up thinking they are being disrespected. Remember, most Indian parents are very emotional. Hug them more often. Smile and apologize, just for hurting them. And they'll be all yours. So, try to be close to them emotionally.
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