Understand what pronouns are. Pronouns are words that a person can use instead of their name to identify themselves. She/her/hers and he/him/his, for example, are typically feminine and masculine pronouns. Gender-neutral pronouns, on the other hand, are preferred by some. Neopronouns are a type of new (neo) pronoun that is increasingly used to refer to people instead of "she," "he," or "they." Neopronouns can be used by anyone, but they are most commonly used by transgender, non-binary, and/or gender nonconforming individuals. Some examples of common neopronouns include with how to pronounce them: xe/xem/xyrs (pronounced zee/zem/zeer) ey/em/eirs (pronounced ay/em/heirs) fae/faer/faers (pronounced fay/fair/fairs) per/per/pers (pronounced pur/pur/pers) ze/hir/hirs (pronounced zee/heers/heers) ve/vir/vis (pronounced vee/veer/veers) ne/nem/nir (pronounced nee/nem/neirs)
Learn how to use common neopronouns in a sentence: xe/xem/xyrs - Used in a sentence: “Xe doesn’t want ketchup with xyr fries." ey/em/eirs - Used in a sentence: “Ey doesn’t want ketchup with eir fries.” fae/faer/faers - Used in a sentence: “Fae doesn’t want ketchup with faer fries.” per/per/pers - Used in a sentence: "Per doesn't want ketchup with per fries." ze/hir/hirs - Used in a sentence: “Ze doesn’t want ketchup with hir fries.” ve/vir/vis - Used in a sentence: "Ve doesn't want ketchup with vir fries." ne/nem/nir - Used in a sentence: "Ne doesn't want ketchup with nir fries." e/em/eir - Used in a sentence: "E doesn't want ketchup with eir fries."
Make an effort to respect neopronouns. Some people see neopronouns as weird and even non-existent. Neopronouns can be a bit confusing and overwhelming. But, given that we're constantly learning new words — or new meanings for old words — we're perfectly capable of doing so. Using a person's requested pronouns, is more than just being respectful; it's also a conscious decision to avoid causing them psychological stress and dysphoria.
Realize that neopronouns are constantly evolving. There's no limit on neopronouns and new sets of pronouns are being constantly created. Neopronouns are often very personal.
Ask a person how to use their neopronouns if you need to. Many people will lay out their pronouns and explain how to pronounce them if they use neopronouns, but if they don't and you don't know how to pronounce their specific pronouns, you can simply ask them. Do not use "they/them" for someone who uses neopronouns if you don't know how to use their neopronouns (unless they say you can). This is referred to as misgendering and can be hurtful.
Practice using neopronouns. Practice, practice, practice. One way could be writing in your journal about your most recent adventure with a friend who uses ze/zir pronouns. Talk about a family member who uses ze/hir to yourself in the mirror. If someone has given you permission, use their neopronouns in conversation with other people. It's not all that difficult if you don't want it to be. A great website with a mini-game to practice pronouns created by LGBTQIA+ educators is Pronouns Minus18.
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