17 Ways to Be More Proactive in Your Everyday Life
17 Ways to Be More Proactive in Your Everyday Life
Do you always feel as though you're reacting to things that happen to you rather than taking the reins in your life? People who are proactive take active control of their lives and the direction they're headed in. If you want to be more proactive, you've come to the right place. We talked to life coaches Jennifer Clark and Amber Rosenberg to learn everything you need to know to adopt a more proactive mindset in your life.
How to Be Proactive

Set concrete, realistic goals.

Use the SMART acronym to create effective goals. "SMART" stands for specific, meaningful, achievable, realistic, and time-based (or trackable). If all of your goals meet these criteria, you'll be more likely to stay on the path toward success. Start by thinking about what you ultimately want in life, then figure out what specific steps you'll need to take to get there. Use SMART short-term goals to motivate yourself and ensure that you're continuing to make progress toward your long-term goals. To figure out what you really want out of life, life coach Jennifer Clark recommends that you go back to your values and determine if they're "in line what what [you] want to be as a person." Clark notes that it's best when people work on authentic goals, because "when they obsess about a goal that's not authentic, it creates distortion, especially when the goal can't be achieved."

Prioritize preventative and maintenance measures.

Anticipate problems and do what you can to prevent them. When you have a reactive mindset, you don't worry about any potential problems until they actually happen. With a proactive mindset, you predict what might happen, then do what you can to prevent negative outcomes. If there's something that can't be prevented, there might at least be things you can do to minimize the damage if it does happen. For example, if you live in a place that has harsh winters, you might take steps to winterize your vehicle in the fall so that you'll have fewer problems with it during the cold months. This applies in personal relationships too. For example, you might speak up immediately when someone violates your boundaries while it's still only a minor issue, rather than waiting until it snowballs into a big deal.

Focus on one thing at a time.

Accomplish more by giving each task your whole attention. Studies show that humans are actually pretty bad at multitasking. In fact, it can sometimes do more harm than good. When you do one thing at a time, you create less stress for yourself, which allows you to stay more even-keeled, emotionally. In that mental state, you're better able to be proactive. If you have a lot of things to do, it can help to go through your to-do list and figure out how long each thing will take to do. Knock out some of the smaller things first and you'll build momentum for the rest of your day.

Let go of the stuff outside of your control.

Use your energy to tackle things you know you can actively change. Life coach Amber Rosenberg emphasizes that you should "make a list of what's in your control versus what's out of your control; focus on what you can influence, let go of what you can't. She recommends that you "notice when your mind wanders to the many scary things that are currently out of your control, take a deep breath (or 500) and refocus on what's in your control." For example, if you're worried about your son's grades at school, you might see that you can't make him get good grades. You can, however, help him study for tests and make sure he eats healthy food and gets enough sleep.

Take initiative instead of waiting for someone else.

Embrace the challenge and act on your plans and goals. Having a proactive mindset means being willing to take the first step toward something you want to achieve. Focus on moving forward, even when your path isn't linear. A more reactive mindset would be to talk about the things you want to achieve but wait on someone else to take you in that direction. For example, if you think you're overdue for a promotion at work, you could be proactive and write a letter to your boss outlining why you deserve a promotion. A more reactive mindset would mean that you simply waited for your boss to come to the same conclusion. This applies to personal and romantic relationships as well. For example, instead of waiting for your partner to propose to you, you might propose to them instead.

Reflect on your actions.

Monitor your progress and change your plans where necessary. Being proactive also means being adaptable. When something you do has a different effect than you planned, evaluate what happened and figure out how you need to adjust course. You might also find ways you can streamline to make the process more efficient. Often, the way forward requires a little trial and error before you figure out the best path to achieve your goals. When you're thinking forward, you're better able to see when something's not going to work out so you can adjust course accordingly.

Focus on finding solutions.

Figure out how to move forward and negotiate hurdles. Identifying a potential stumbling block is only the first step. Being proactive means moving beyond that to figure out how to get past that problem if it does arise. If the problem is already there, it means that you're looking for ways to resolve the problem rather than just sitting around worrying or complaining about it. For example, if a coworker has really bad body odor, you might want to brainstorm solutions or seek more understanding of their issues, rather than sit idly by and complain about them with other coworkers.

Spend your time with motivated people.

Positive people will push you to excel and take action. The people who are around you all of the time ultimately influence your values and your mindset. By surrounding yourself with positive, growth-oriented people, you'll strengthen your own proactive mindset. If there are people in your life who have a more negative or fixed mindset, do what you can to limit your time and exposure to them.

Keep a calm and level head.

Make decisions only when you're in control of your emotions. Emotions are, by their very definition, reactive. When you act based on your emotions, you're in a reactive mindset rather than a proactive mindset. To empower a more proactive mindset, take a few minutes away and use breathing exercises to calm yourself. Only attempt to resolve a situation when you are calm enough to evaluate all of the potential options. Having tools and resources at your disposal to help you control your emotions is a big part of being proactive. In fact, you could say that you're being proactive about being proactive, because you're preventing things that could potentially limit your ability to be proactive in the future.

Hold yourself accountable.

Take responsibility for everything you do and fail to do. The idea that you are responsible for what happens to you is the foundation of a proactive mindset. When you blame circumstances or other people for your actions, you're putting yourself in a reactive position. Holding yourself accountable also allows you to learn from your mistakes and enhance your skills and knowledge. If you're having difficulty with this, consider recruiting one of your friends to be your accountability partner. The two of you can help hold each other accountable so it's easier to be proactive. Clark notes that when you get off track, you have to pause and look at what's important to you: "What's important to [you] has to be the starting point of any goal. Most goals are created out of ego, fear, or insecurity."

Treat failure as an opportunity.

Learn from your mistakes to become a more proactive person. When you encounter a stumbling block or something doesn't go exactly how you predicted it would, figure out what you could have done differently. Incorporate that knowledge into your future plans so that you don't make the same mistake twice. Learning from your mistakes also helps you be more adaptable because it's easier to see how your actions impact what happens around you.

Develop a routine.

Consistency helps you use your time more efficiently. The more things you do out of habit and routine, the less things you have to think about on a daily basis. You have more energy to devote to important things when you don't have to think about the basics, like when you'll go to bed. When you have a regular routine, you'll also find that it's easier for you to maximize the time you have available during the day. Having a regular routine also makes you more predictable to other people, which means they'll also believe that you're more reliable and trustworthy. This reputation can come in handy when you're trying to accomplish something and need some help.

Channel anxious energy into something productive.

Keep moving forward rather than getting bogged down by anxiety. Transform your focus and use that anxious energy to improve your life. Even if you can only accomplish smaller tasks, getting something done will help you feel more positive and productive. If you can't focus your mind, go for a walk or even do a few push-ups just to get your body moving and help lower your anxiety levels. Talking to people you trust about the things you're worried about can also help relieve some of your stress. For example, if someone is bullying you at work, you might talk to your best friend about it and ask what they would do. EXPERT TIP Amber Rosenberg, PCC Amber Rosenberg, PCC Pacific Life Coach Amber Rosenberg is a Professional Life Coach, Career Coach, and Executive Coach based in the San Francisco Bay Area. As the owner of Pacific Life Coach, she has 20+ years of coaching experience and a background in corporations, tech companies, and nonprofits. Amber trained with the Coaches Training Institute and is a member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF). Amber Rosenberg, PCC Amber Rosenberg, PCC Pacific Life Coach When you're overwhelmed try getting out of your head. Throwing cold water on your face can lower your heart rate and anxiety. You can also go outside and get some exercise. Or find green images. The color green can reduce the stress response in your system and help you relax and not be as reactive.

Volunteer to take the lead.

Take on a leadership role to feel more of a sense of purpose. When you're proactive, you're focused on doing what needs to be done to achieve the goal at hand. Because you're thinking ahead, you can effectively direct others to contribute the most value. And because you're accountable, you understand how to take responsibility for others. Proactive leaders are important not just in the workplace but in your personal life as well. Being proactive with your family or in your romantic relationship helps strengthen your bond with the people you love.

Empathize and explore new perspectives.

Listen to and incorporate other viewpoints to find the best path. Your way isn't the only way of doing things—and it might not even be the best way. Likewise, your response to a situation might differ depending on the context or someone else's interpretation of events. If you try to look at things through other people's eyes, you'll gain greater insights that allow you to be more confidently proactive. For example, if someone is rude to you at work, you might remind yourself that everyone is doing the best they can and that not everyone has the same levels of emotional intelligence or support systems that help them feel loved and appreciated. EXPERT TIP Amber Rosenberg, PCC Amber Rosenberg, PCC Pacific Life Coach Amber Rosenberg is a Professional Life Coach, Career Coach, and Executive Coach based in the San Francisco Bay Area. As the owner of Pacific Life Coach, she has 20+ years of coaching experience and a background in corporations, tech companies, and nonprofits. Amber trained with the Coaches Training Institute and is a member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF). Amber Rosenberg, PCC Amber Rosenberg, PCC Pacific Life Coach Our Expert Agrees: 90 percent of what people say or do is about them, not you. Once you understand that, you can flip a situation around and better understand why the other person did or said what they did. If your child is difficult at home, think about what they might be going through at school or with their friends. Their situation outside of your house can affect what's happening inside your house.

Interrogate your negative assumptions.

Flip the script when you're tempted to assume the worst. Keep an open mind instead of automatically thinking the worst is going to happen and you'll find it a lot easier to be proactive. When you find yourself assuming the worst, ask yourself what might happen if you instead assumed the best. For example, if someone doesn't respond to your text message right away, you might find yourself thinking it's because they hate you. Instead, you might imagine that they're super busy or don't have their phone on them and will respond to you as soon as they can.

Choose to focus on the bright side.

Have a positive outlook so it's easier to stay proactive. When you have a positive outlook, you see any setbacks as only temporary. You know that you'll persevere—that you'll find a way to overcome challenges and adapt to changes when necessary to achieve your goals. So there's no sense in getting down about any problems you face. Use positive affirmations to transform the negative thoughts in your head into more empowering motivational thoughts.

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