What does Scorpio love look like?
They talk openly about their past and their childhood. This is a big one. As Eyedealism notes, "vulnerability is a cherished prize for a Scorpio. They like to keep their vulnerability to themselves." If they show you their inner world and their inner sensitivity, "that means they trust you enough to love you." Vulnerability is really important to Scorpio. "Without vulnerability, there is no intimacy," Eyedealism continues, "So that's why Scorpio is the sign of intimacy."
They discuss their beliefs and core values with you. Scorpios also keep their core beliefs close to their chest—they don't broadcast them to just anybody. If they're willing to tell you what's really important to them and what they really want out of life, they think you're a keeper. This doesn't mean they'll reveal all of their cards to you. A Scorpio typically values their privacy above all, so no matter how much they love you, chances are there will still be a part of them that remains a mystery to you. This also ties into vulnerability. Because Scorpios don't typically share their beliefs with people, they'll feel vulnerable about revealing them to you.
They check in with you a lot. This is primarily because a Scorpio prioritizes emotions—but because they love you, they prioritize your emotions, and especially your happiness, over all. If you're upset, they'll do whatever they can to make you happy again. At times this might come across as controlling. While Scorpios do have a reputation for being controlling, normally all of these check-ins come from a place of concern for you.
They ask you a million questions about everything you do. Once you've entered a Scorpio's orbit, they want to know absolutely everything about you. This is where the obsessive nature of Scorpio kicks in—if they fall in love, every detail about that person becomes the most important thing in the world. Scorpio has a reputation for being paranoid, but usually this curiosity is motivated by a deep interest, not worry or fear. Scorpios can also get jealous, especially if they love you. Eyedealism notes that they'll "show you their underbelly" if you show "even the tiniest bit of interest in other people." To a Scorpio, every moment you spend with someone else is a moment you didn't spend with them—and they want all of the moments. If they couldn't be there, the best they can do is learn everything about it.
They view you as their support system and closest confidante. Scorpios "see secrets as powerful weapons," Eyedealism explains. "So that's why they always want to find out your secrets but they don't want to tell you theirs. If a Scorpio reveals their secrets, then that means they're very serious about you." It also means that they trust you, which is important in and of itself. Scorpio is "the most distrustful sign," Eyedealism remarks. "So if they show anything that indicates trust in you, that means they are serious about you."
They go out of their way to spend more time with you. Scorpio tends to be a pretty obsessive sign, so if a Scorpio is in love with you, they want to spend as much time with you as possible. They'll do everything they can to maximize the amount of time the two of you have together. This can even include wanting to move in together fairly soon after you start dating. A Scorpio might reason it's the best way for the two of you to spend more time together.
They are quick to stand up for you or defend you. When a Scorpio is in love, their protective streak comes out in full force. They'll leap to your defense if anyone challenges or questions you. Scorpio love is a "ride or die" kind of love that will never leave your side. A protective Scorpio looks out for all of your needs as well. For example, if you're out together for several hours, they might ask if you're hungry or insist on getting something to eat.
They introduce you to their close friends and family. Scorpios tend to be super cautious about letting people get close to them. This means they're also cautious about introducing someone new to those folks who are already in their inner circle. You can tell a Scorpio is head-over-heels if they're inviting you home for the holidays. A Scorpio typically won't introduce you to someone by accident. They understand that even a childhood friend is capable of unlocking a lot of information about them that they might not be ready to reveal yet.
Attracting and Seducing a Scorpio
Meet their gaze and maintain eye contact. Scorpios are known for their penetrating gaze. Most will quickly glance in another direction—manage to hold it, and you'll definitely capture their attention. It's about more than eye contact. Scorpios tend to be attracted to people who are confident and stand their own ground. Maintaining eye contact is a great way to show that scorpion that you won't be intimidated. "Look them straight in the eye," Eyedealism advises. "It's a very tense sign," she notes, but "if you're very trustworthy and solid, they finally will relax."
Flirt and flatter while maintaining an air of mystery. "If you provide a little bit of mystery that they need to unravel," Eyedealism advises, "they will keep pulling on the yarn forever. So don't give it all up." "Don't give it all up right away," Eyedealism continues. "Leave a veil of mystery and then they will be intrigued and they will obsess over you."
Choose date night activities steeped in glamor and intrigue. The nature of seduction is deeply appealing to Scorpios. If you want to watch a scorpion get a little hot around the collar, plan a date night with the same vibes as a James Bond flick. Tell them you're going to leave them shaken and stirred. A Scorpio typically likes traditional romantic trappings as well—candlelit dinners, gourmet chocolates, and beautiful flowers will all go over well with a scorpion.
Open your heart to them. Scorpios are deeply attracted to (if not a little turned on by) vulnerability. And don't worry—you won't find a safer or more supporting person to bare your soul to. If you're hoping that Scorpio will fall in love with you, opening up and sharing a deeply personal and vulnerable story from your past is a great place to start. For example, you might relate a story from your childhood that shaped how you feel about clowns.
Offer emotional support and a shoulder to cry on. Scorpios typically expect to get what they give when it comes to emotional support. They have a wellspring of empathy and look for a romantic partner who has the same. As a water sign, they tend to believe that emotions are extremely valuable and that you can learn a lot from them. Validate their feelings first, before you start thinking about ways to help them. Remember that sometimes they just want to vent before they come up with a solution.
Show them that you listen to them. A Scorpio typically needs to feel emotionally safe with someone before they'll truly let them in. One way to help them feel safe with you is to do little things for them from time to time that show that you pay attention when they talk to you. They'll be able to relax if they can clearly see that you actively listen. For example, if they tell you that they're stressing out about a presentation on Thursday, you might send them their favorite snack as a good luck treat that morning with a note that you're thinking about them.
Dating a Scorpio
They show their love through the little things they do. Scorpios are really private people and the way they show their love is private too. Theirs is not a "shout it from the rooftops" type of love—they're more likely to whisper it in a voice only you can hear. For example, your Scorpio partner might bring you over an umbrella because there is rain in the forecast in the afternoon, when you're going to be out, and your umbrella broke last week. A Scorpio will pay close attention to all of your favorite things so they know what to get for you—after all, why just get something you merely like when they can get your absolute favorite?
Scorpios tend to keep walls up. Scorpio is a sign of secrecy and dating a scorpion doesn't mean that they're going to let you know everything—especially not right away. Some might even say that you'll never completely know a Scorpio, no longer how long you're with them. That might be an exaggeration, but it at least gives you some idea what to expect.
Scorpios prefer honesty, no matter what. A Scorpio would rather you tell the truth than spare their feelings—and they'll appreciate your honesty, even if it stings a little. Knowledge is power for a Scorpio and allows them to fix whatever is bothering you (which they can't do if they don't know about it). Just keep in mind that they're going to give you the same honesty that they expect from you, which means if you're in a close relationship with a Scorpio you're bound to get your feelings hurt at least once. It can help if you adopt a similar attitude—that you have to know about something if you want to do something about it.
Scorpios are profoundly devoted to their partners. This makes sense given that a Scorpio is so cautious about letting anyone get close to them. After putting in all of that time and effort to make sure they can trust you to come that close, you best believe that they aren't going to do anything to put that relationship in jeopardy. Scorpios are far more likely to try to work things out than to throw in the towel—when a relationship has run its course, their partner is usually the one to end it. A scorpion deals with heartbreak about how you would expect—by locking themselves away and feeling all of the feelings associated with the experience. But after a week or so, they'll be right back out there.
Scorpio Relationship Red Flags
They back down from a fight or disagreement. Scorpio is a fixed sign—which can make them a bit stubborn at times. If they're quick to back down and aren't interested in taking a stand for what they believe in, that's a pretty big sign that there's something going on with them. At first blush, it might seem like it's a good thing that they're letting you have your way—but that's not really what's going on. When a Scorpio backs down like this, it's often a sign that they've lost their passion for or interest in the relationship.
They don't want to talk about something. A Scorpio is never afraid to really dig in and unpack an issue, even if it ends up taking all night. So if they insist that everything's fine? It's likely the opposite—especially if you can tell something is bothering them but they tell you that nothing's wrong. Keep in mind that this primarily applies to things they've talked to you about in the past. Scorpios are typically pretty secretive, which means there are often a lot of things they don't particularly want to talk about.
They stop taking your feelings into account. Scorpio is one of the most sensitive signs in the zodiac. They go to great ends to protect their own feelings, as well as the feelings of anyone they love. If they don't check in on you and aren't concerned about how you feel all of the time, it could be because their love for you is waning. This is another Scorpio red flag that can seem confusing, especially if you've recently complained that they check in on you too much—you might think that they're simply doing what they think you want. Likewise, if they don't consult you before doing something—especially if it's something you'd likely get upset about—that's a red flag that they've likely got one foot out the door.
Loving a Scorpio Woman
A Scorpio woman needs a partner who respects her privacy. This can be tough to remember when she's peppering you with a million questions about where you were and who was there, but Scorpio ladies are super-private and really don't like to share a lot of details. If you hit on something she feels is deeply personal and she clams up, don't push her on it. If she sees that you're giving her the space that she needs and respecting her privacy, she'll be more likely to see you as a safe person and let you in. Scorpio women can be totally captivating, but remember if you want to get super close to them you have to be trustworthy—and be willing to put in the time and effort it takes to build that trust.
Loving a Scorpio Man
A Scorpio man is a lot more sensitive than he lets on. Scorpio guys are masters at hiding their feelings, which means it's totally possible for you to hurt him without realizing it. At the same time, though, he's always going to value your honesty. Just be aware that he might be carrying around more emotions than he's letting you see. If he seems like he's upset about something, give him some space. Once he's had some time to reflect and recharge, he'll likely be more open to you.
Scorpio Compatibility
Scorpio has the best romantic potential with Earth signs. Scorpio needs to feel safe and secure in order to flourish and Earth signs (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn) symbolize practicality and stability. In return, the Earth sign is treated to their Scorpio partner's full emotional depth. Eyedealism agrees that Scorpio vibes well with Earth signs, noting that "I always felt that Scorpios need to be with somebody like a Taurus." "Taurus is so stuck in their ways," Eyedealism explains, "they need to be with somebody who's very passionate and keeps things moving." Of the Earth signs, Scorpio will find a relationship with Virgo potentially the most challenging, mainly because Virgo can be a bit squeamish and might find Scorpio a bit over-the-top.
Scorpio has intense emotional bonds with other water signs. There's no questioning the passion between a Scorpio and another water sign (Cancer, Pisces, or fellow Scorpio)—it's always deep, and it's always intense, but it isn't always love. While water signs tend to have similar perspectives, they don't always see eye to eye. Scorpio has the potential for the most passionate relationship with Cancer. When these two are good for each other, there's nothing they can't accomplish together.
Scorpio and air signs rarely cross paths. It's not that they don't like each other—in fact, some of Scorpio's close friends might be air signs (Aquarius, Gemini, Libra). But they're really unlikely to meet each other in a romantic setting because they're both looking for very different things in a potential partner. For example, a Scorpio is usually looking for someone who is deeply empathetic and emotionally intelligent. Air signs, however, favor a more objective, logical approach to the world. Air signs tend to be very cool and rational on the outside and favor a more curious, cerebral approach. They can get really confused by Scorpio's passionate, emotional responses.
Scorpio tends to clash with most fire signs. The fire signs (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius) tend to be brash, bombastic, and open—in many ways the opposite of the closed, private Scorpio. They also tend to focus on actions while Scorpio focuses more on feelings, which means they're not on the same page a lot of the time. That's not to say a relationship between Scorpio and a fire sign can't work, but they both have to be willing to compromise—and that can be easier said than done.
Scorpio Fast Facts
The mysterious Scorpio feels deeply and passionately. Emotionally intuitive and deeply sensitive, a Scorpio values their privacy and is cautious about who they let in. As sincere and loyal as they are secretive, scorpions are incredibly protective of the people they love. Dates: October 23—November 21 Symbol: scorpion Ruling planets: Mars and Pluto Element: water Modality: fixed Keywords: passionate, intense, emotional, probing, fixed, obsessive Famous Scorpios: Katy Perry, Ryan Reynolds, Amandla Stenberg, Penn Badgley, Willow Smith, Travis Barker, Shailene Woodley
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